Gloomy updates

These past few days have not been good. Everything that I have so carefully built up and maintained just came crashing down. I cannot focus. I feel so scattered. I feel like melting into the carpet. And that hard found will to do what I want to do...that motivation I struggled so hard to put in place...just sputtered, and died. I don't even remember how it feels like anymore. That life, and that summer sun. Even the weather follows my mental state now. Bleak. Empty. Lifeless. Desperate. Rainy. Cold.
Yeah well. At least I helped cook for thirty on Monday for iFocus.
Gloomy updates.
Fly project rejected me. just coz I'm a first year.
Implying a really screwed summer
BOTH my college children are in Computer Science.
I forgot to turn up to the contract signing thing for Oriel Ball. Not that I'm keen on working in the cloak room.
I also forgot to apply for holiday accomodation.
Au Pair application is very dreary and seems hopeless. But still, one hopes.
I got dumped. seriously. I never envisioned it. It's not even official. There're no words for it.
I have a lab report due in five hours and the data set is eleven pages long.
I am also being ignored which is specifically what I asked for.
I am watching Sex and the City to keep myself sane. That is not a good sign.
Have also been considering going out with..ahem...someone. An equally bad sign. A sign of desperation
Either that, or to go for Cloud 9 events. Google "Cloud 9, oxford" for implications.

This is sad. Things better turn out ok. I bloody did what You wanted this time! Even dunked my head in water to prove it.